There are ways in which we unwittingly create situations in our lives that will wound us in the very same ways we’ve been wounded before, usually the painful and traumatic experiences of our childhood. There are unconscious parts of us that insist on continuing to experience these Cherished Pain States, and they also object to us having whatever its opposite might be: certain kinds of happiness, success, love, self-love, and so on. This isn’t metaphysics, it’s psychology, and it begins and ends with the psychological structure we call the identity.

In this article, I’m going to illuminate in very fine detail exactly how and why this happens. We’ll start with an in-depth discussion of identity, trauma, and the results of having formed one’s identity amid experiences of trauma. This sets us up to more deeply understand the Cherished Pain States, and why/how we keep creating them even if we have all the awareness in the world of what we’re doing. I will illuminate the necessary steps on the path out of these patterns, as well as the role that MDMA-Assisted Therapy can play along this journey.